Confused.com

    That’s me – confused.

    I thought I’d started getting my head together but it seems I’ve not. Well, maybe I have – it might be everyone else…

    As anyone who reads this blog knows, Harriett and I aren’t together any longer. That isn’t to say we don’t see each other at all – we’re best friends and probably see each other 3 or 4 times a week (usually a few drinks are involved too).

    Anyway, I met a woman, got on well and have been out with her 3 times – taking her to dinner tomorrow night 🙂 The weirdest thing about all this is, until Harriett mentioned it, I hadn’t even thought about sleeping with her – we get on well together, have a laugh, no uncomfortable silences etc. That’s not to say I’m not attracted to her – she’s lovely (will post a picture at some point) – I think I’ve matured with age, and no longer do I have to prove myself by bedding women in the quickest time possible (personal record is 20 minutes from meeting someone to getting her into bed – yes, it was impressive to me at the time)

    I mentioned all this to Harriett as that’s what friends do, and she seemed pleased for me. Then I get a couple of strange texts.

    Basically, I have no idea what she (Harriett) wants from me – as far as I can tell, she wants me to be happy, but that’s NOT to include other women…

    So here I am, back to the “don’t have a clue what’s going on” stage. Is Harriett being:

    1) Just unfair to me.
    2) Very bad at telling me it’s me she wants?
    3) — Space for rent —

    Why is there no manual for life?

    On a different note, I get claustrophobic in enclosed spaces (where else would you get it?), so I tend to avoid lifts (although I can now ride in one without panicking too much), caves etc.

    So last night Dennis asked me if I’d like to watch a film with him, his missus, and a couple of friends. I figured it’d make a change from getting drunk, so I went along.

    The film was ‘The Cave’ or something similar. I managed to watch about 20 minutes before I had to leave – I was getting so stressed out watching these scenes where people were in these water-filled caves squeezed into tiny spaces – it’s made me shake just thinking about it again.

    So I went and had some beer – as you do.

    She doesn’t read my blog (as far as I know), so I can say this here without being told off:

    Harriett, I love you – you know that. I’m gutted we’re not together, but happy we’re really good friends. I think about you a lot of the time and miss you so much when I’m doing things alone (not THAT – keep it clean 😉 ), but I’m not a monk. I’ve (grudgingly) accepted you’re seeing someone else, you have to do the same for me – or tell me what you really want.

    Oh yeah, today’s the day the septics fuck up again vote in the new leader of the empire president. Do me (and the rest of the world) a favour eh? DON’T FUCK IT UP AGAIN!

    Rik – I’ll email you later when I get home, but January sounds like a fun day…I’m in 🙂

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    3 thoughts on “Confused.com

    1. Yay for fun days in January. I’ll book in your name, and get the tickets organised. Do you have a preferable day, in that it’s 3 days (Tue/Wed/Thu). I normally go up on the Monday night, stay overnight, then battle the early morning traffic to Earls Court on the Tuesday morning. And you’re welcome to meet us the night before, and even share the room. I will have John and Steff with me as well though. You are allowed up to 4 in a travelodge room.

    2. Gosh, don’t know where to even start with the whole Harriett thing…best to keep doing what you’re doing. If she makes any more comments, gestures or anything close to that, just tell her what you wrote in your blog…hopefully she isn’t messing with you, or going thru the “I don’t want him but don’t want anyone else to have him either” syndrome.
      Good Luck my friend. I’m here if you need me 🙂

      Now to the most important, 20 min??? damn! I learn so much fromy your blogs. You are so not the same guy I met several years ago (met=chat in a room, online)Well at least you aren’t the same guy you put on to be. Quiet and shy my ass! 🙂

    3. Oh, and I’d send Harriet a text with the link to your blog. A subtle way of saying what you feel.

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